Arms Wide Open

When my children were younger, I would go around the house and check on them after they were asleep. Sometimes I would do the mental check when one of them were away for a camping trip or sleepover. One, two, three...everyone accounted for...except for my firstborn; the daughter I put up for adoption when I was sixteen. 

Some of my close friends, family, and high school mates know this story. For those of you that don't...

I was fifteen when I got pregnant. I attended Portsmouth Catholic High School. I loved my boyfriend. I cried all summer; not because I was newly pregnant but because my parents forbade me to spend time with the young man they blamed for my situation. 

By the end of August, they had relented somewhat. I could feel the baby moving by this time and the baby's daddy and I went for walks everyday. I did incredibly healthy things. I went to the doctor, took my vitamins, ate good food, cut out SUGAR and caffeine. I went to school everyday and earned excellent grades. I did everything right. 

Nia

On February 1, 1983 I took my last exam for the semester (Latin). On the morning of February 2, I woke up with a back ache. By 5 p.m. the baby was born without drugs or mechanical help. She was beautiful. She slipped out with a whoosh and the doctor placed her on the outside of my belly. Wow, she was heavy. Eight pounds, 2 ounces; born just in time for dinner. 

My friends and teachers had been calling the hospital to find out if the baby had been born yet but because I was underage, it was against hospital policy to tell anyone if I was there. A placard which read NO INFORMATION ADAMS was hung on her bassinet. When my sister, Fara, saw that sign she said, "Nia". For 28 years, she has been Nia to me.

Two years ago, I started to get serious about finding the woman I had let go as an infant. I contacted Adoption Services in Richmond (with some help from my dear friend, Melina) and was told to write a letter for the file. It took me a year to do that. I just didn't know what to say. About a year ago, I did write the letter. After many follow up calls, I received an important email last week. Nia had come into the Chesapeake office, filing the paperwork requesting that her adoption records be released. They found my letters and current info waiting. On Friday, September 30 I met Nia for the the second time. Her name is Karen Jarman. We welcome her with arms wide open. 

The head count is complete.

I extend heartfelt gratitude to Vickie Sessler and all of Karen's family for supporting her decision to find the families that have been missing her.